“At what point did you believe the lie?”

Candace’s notes:

“Did God really say?” is the question for all generations.

God created you to never know shame.

If you don’t really know what God says about you, you’re going to spend all of your life chasing the wrong thing and feeling like you’re not good enough.

Turn down the voice of the world, and turn up the voice of God.

“The Shaming Culture” “The Outrage Culture” but God actually created us not to know what shame is.

If the enemy can’t get your soul, he’ll try to get your fruitfulness.

Faith without works is dead. Obedience is not legalism, obedience will lead to a flourishing life.

Don’t have a big dialogue with the devil! Don’t sit there and speak with him!

What you did is not who you are. There is a difference between your who and your do. Confession is not a legalistic thing, it is such a gift that I could go and pour my heart out before God …and He forgives me.

“At what point did you believe the lie?” Who told you?

Discussion Questions

• How can we go about turning down the voice of the world, and turning up the voice of God?

• Do you find yourself listening to that inner voice of shame a lot?

• Would you say your relationship with Jesus is producing fruit in your life?

• What’s your main takeaway from that message?

This month, let’s focus on identifying the areas that we are participating WITH the shame, instead of against it. What does true freedom in Christ look like? What thought patterns, mindsets, and attitudes do you need to work on dismantling and replacing with grace?

• Practice scripture meditation and declaration this month! Pick one of the following verses per week, and write it somewhere you will see it every day. Focus on this verse, spend 10 minutes in the morning thinking about it, saying it out loud over your life, and let it be the last 10 minutes of your day as well.

• Galatians 5:1, “So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t get tied up again in slavery to the law.”

• Romans 8:1-2, “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. 2 And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.”

• 1 Peter 2:16, “For you are free, yet you are God’s slaves, so don’t use your freedom as an excuse to do evil.”

• 2 Corinthians 12:9, “Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”

The Point of Prayer

Discussion:

1. We’re in a series about prayer right now as a church…what was your biggest takeaway from this message this past weekend?

2. What have you learned about prayer lately?

3. Has God answered any of your prayers lately?

4. What’s the one story or passage from the Bible do you think of, when you think of prayer?

5. What is the point of praying to God?

1. Join FV in our daily Bible Plan on the YouVersion Bible App! Comment each day about what God is teaching you, and read everyone else’s comments.

2. Fast with us for one morning a week, just one breakfast, and pray extra. Make a list of prayer requests maybe, or try some new way of spending time with God. Be intentional about it!

The Sanity Checklist

It’s been a tough year. There is no denying it. Plans cancelled, sickness, worrying about the people you love, anger at people who don’t agree, politics & controversy & chaos. Denying any of this won’t make it go away. So how do we maintain joy and momentum in our spiritual lives when everything feels so overwhelming?

Well, I think I have developed a checklist to help us with this, practically!

1. We acknowledge that we aren’t in control, but we know who is.

   1. something for God

   2. Psalms 63:4-5 TPT, “Daily I will worship you passionately and with all my heart. My arms will wave to you like banners of praise. I overflow with praise when I come before you, for the anointing of your presence satisfies me like nothing else. You are such a rich banquet of pleasure to my soul.”

   3. Read the Bible, make a prayer list, listen to a podcast or YouTube sermon, worship God alone along with some music, spend time in silence listening to Him, etc). List of Spiritual Disciplines here.

2. We acknowledge that it’s okay to feel low, but we can’t stay there.

   1. something for me

   2. Proverbs 17:22 ESV, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

   3. Fun feeds the soul. (an article from the psychological point of view)

   4. Learning about yourself is also an excellent way to do something for yourself. (Try a personality test, or try something new.)

3. We acknowledge that our behavior and attitudes do have an effect on others.

   1. something for the people closest to me

   2. 1 Thessalonians 5:11, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

   3. Ideas for married couples, date ideas during COVID, keep kids busy and happy

4. We acknowledge that we can make a difference in the lives of people outside our household too.

   1. something for others

   2. Hebrews 10:23-25 ESV, “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

   3. Reaching out during the pandemic

Throughout this whole year, my mantra has been, “one day at a time”. Some of those days have been incredibly low, and I counted it a win that I just got through it without dissolving into a puddle. There were a couple days where I was just proud of myself for taking a shower, or doing a load of laundry.

I think if I had come up with this list earlier in the year, I might have been somewhat better off. And I think if I start writing these down in a journal, I’ll be amazed to see what it will do after a month, 3 months, a year.

Being vibrant, passionate, and selfless doesn’t come naturally. It comes from Jesus. The Holy Spirit can bring these things out of us, but sometimes we have to discipline ourselves to start the process.

Discussion

1. As a group, list some ways that you can help yourself laugh, even in the middle of the pandemic.

2. What is your favorite way to get closer to God lately?

3. What have you done lately to check on and care for the people that you live with?

4. What can you do this week to reach out to people outside your household?

1. Start a Checklist. I call mine “The Sanity Checklist”…but you can call yours something else if you want. :)

2. Begin to read the book of Psalms. I HIGHLY recommend The Passion Translation.

   1. The book of Psalms always speaks to me when I’m feeling emotions particularly passionately. Because David (the writer of most of the Psalms) did too. And it reminds me that it’s okay to feel low, it’s okay to feel passionate, it’s okay to feel whatever I’m feeling, as long as I’m letting God in on the conversation.

3. If you want to do more, watch this TD Jakes message, about what to do in times of crisis.

"We Are Social Animals"

I’ve always thought of the term “accountability partners” as a solely religious thing. But actually, this term is in the business world too, and it functions pretty much exactly the same way.

God has placed us in community, in families. In the beginning, He said it wasn’t good for man to be alone. We have to believe that’s for a reason!

“Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”

— Genesis 2:18

Throughout the Bible, we can see God giving his leaders partners in ministry, life, and leadership! When we need help, God will often send a person!

• Moses said he couldn’t do what God had called him to do at the burning bush, and so God sent Aaron. In Exodus 17.8-15, Aaron and Hur join to hold up Moses's hands that enabled Joshua and the Israelites to over their adversary

• When the prophet Elijah needed food, God sent the widow. When he cried out to God for help, at Mt. Sinai, God appointed more leaders.

• In Luke 10, Jesus sends his disciples out in pairs.

• Paul had many partners in ministry, throughout his missionary journeys.

Ecclesiastes 4:9 ESV, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil.

---

In Christian accountability, we tend to focus on 4 main areas of growth:

1. Are you growing in your relationship with God?

2. Are you growing in your relationships with people?

3. Are you becoming a better steward of your resources?

4. Are you growing in your influence with outsiders?

---

If you had someone that you knew was going to ask you those questions every week, how would that change your perspective and mindset? How would you measure whether or not you were growing?

---

Discussion:

1. Have you ever had someone you would have considered an accountability partner? What was that like?

2. What do you think you would look for in an accountability partner?

3. What area do you hope to grow the most in this year (refer to 4 spiritual growth questions above)?

4. Can you think of any other Bible characters that had helpers or partners?

1. Find an accountability partner or two. A group of 3 would work just as well, but probably not many more than that! Don’t be discouraged if you get a “no” at first, stay committed until you find the right person/group for you! It will work best if the whole group is also committed to CALLED, but doesn’t have to be. Plan to meet at least once before our next First Wednesday.

2. Take a serious look at the spiritual growth questions from above. What is your strongest area? What is your weakest area? Where do you hope to grow the most this year? Discuss this with your partner(s). Plan some goals in those areas.

3. GO FURTHER: Watch this video from Pastor Dharius Daniels titled, “What About Your Friends?”. You can see my sermon notes here.

   1. Read 1 Samuel 16-18 at home this month, and really consider the perspective of each character (might mean you have to read previous chapters and maybe watch The Bible Project’s 1 Samuel video for context too).

      • What questions does this bring up for you?

      • After listening to this message, would you consider yourself a good friend?

      • What does healthy accountability look like in your life?

The Best Part of Waking Up

READING ASSIGNMENT THIS WEEK:

Read Matthew 8-10 this week. Comment here to discuss!

Speak To Me

KEY SCRIPTURES

And the Lord came and called as before, “Samuel! Samuel!” And Samuel replied, “Speak, your servant is listening.”
1 Samuel 3:10 NLT

“Be still, and know that I am God! ...”
Psalm 46:10 NLT

Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.
Proverbs 3:6 NLT

SERMON NOTES

Don’t pray for God to speak, unless you want to hear what He has to say.

Prayer is communicating with our God, our Father, going before His throne room of grace. It’s not us just talking to Him, but praying is actually listening to God. God is always speaking, the question is, are you ever listening? God is a speaking God.

How do I hear the voice of God?

1. Fight to be still before God. Pause and rest in His presence. Psalm 46

   1. God speaks through His Word.

   2. God speaks through people.

   3. God speaks through circumstances.

   4. God speaks through His spirit. Unusual senses or promptings. “God, who do you want me to pray for? Sit and listen. Breathe in, listen, and out, say the name.”

2. Be willing.

3. Be ready.

DISCUSSION

1. Would you describe yourself as more of a talker or a listener?

2. Did you pray at mealtime with your family when you were growing up? If so, what sort of prayer did you pray?

3. How do you most often hear from God?

4. In order to hear God’s voice, we need to be still, be willing, and be ready. Which of those three things do you think you struggle with the most? Why?

5. What is God showing you right now?

STUDY AT HOME

1. Read 1 Samuel 3:1-21. When was the last time you were completely still before God, listening for His voice?

2. How do you most often hear from God? Dedicate some time this week to listening in that way.

3. Are you tired of playing it safe with your faith? Then check out the Dangerous Prayers Bible Plan at: www.go2.lc/dangerousprayers

Make Me Bold

KEY SCRIPTURES

Our prayers are just too safe. Predictable. Mundane. Rote. Safe. Sometimes I look at prayers like that and wonder if God looks at them almost like an insult.

“Let me clearly state to all of you and to all the people of Israel that he was healed by the powerful name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, the man you crucified but whom God raised from the dead.”
Acts 4:10 NLT

You killed him. But God raised him from the dead. Sadducees did not believe in resurrection of any kind, so Peter was basically declaring war.

The members of the council were amazed when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, for they could see that they were ordinary men with no special training in the Scriptures. ...
Acts 4:13 NLT

They did NOT pray: “Keep us safe from the bad guys. Don’t let anything bad happen to us.”

“And now, O Lord, hear their threats, and give us, your servants, great boldness in preaching your word. Stretch out your hand with healing power; may miraculous signs and wonders be done through the name of your holy servant Jesus.” After this prayer, the meeting place shook, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit. Then they preached the word of God with boldness.
Acts 4:29-31 NLT

How amazed are people by YOUR boldness? Rate yourself 1-10.
From a Biblical sense, boldness is not a personality trait. You can be naturally quiet, but when the Holy Spirit comes on you, you’re proclaiming truth with boldness.
Lots of ways to be bold:

• Choosing not to gossip, when everyone else is.

• Dressing modestly, when no one else is.

• Bringing people to church, vs, inviting to church

• Standing up for truth when no one else is.

What would happen if every day this week you took a few moments and just asked God to make you bold today. (Set an alarm on your phone)

“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere ...”
Acts 1:8 NLT

They arrested the apostles and put them in the public jail. But an angel of the Lord came at night, opened the gates of the jail, and brought them out. Then he told them, “Go to the Temple and give the people this message of life!” So at daybreak the apostles entered the Temple, as they were told, and immediately began teaching. ...
Acts 5:18-21 NLT

If you’re daring enough to pray a very dangerous faith filled prayer of boldness:

1. Almost always triggers spiritual opposition. Acts 5:18-21

2. Boldness often releases God’s miracles. Acts 5:19

3. Boldness always requires faith.

You never know what our God might set into motion with a single act of bold obedience.

“We gave you strict orders never again to teach in this man’s name!” he said. “Instead, you have filled all Jerusalem with your teaching about him, and you want to make us responsible for his death!” But Peter and the apostles replied, “We must obey God rather than any human authority.”
Acts 5:28-29 NLT

DISCUSSION

1. How comfortable are you with prayer?

2. What does it mean to have bold faith?

3. How would living more boldly change your life?

4. Talk about a recent time when you had an opportunity to share your faith or were bold for Jesus.

5. Would you be willing to pray out loud in a room full of people? Why or why not?

STUDY AT HOME

1. Read Acts 4:1-31. On a scale of 1 to 10, how amazed are people by your boldness?

2. Think about the people you interact with. What opportunities do you have to be bold in your faith this coming week?

3. Set a goal for yourself to pray longer than you ever have before.

   • Father, thanks to You, we don’t have to live a life of fear. You give us the boldness to overcome any obstacle that comes our way. Help us to trust You no matter how difficult life seems and to step forward in obedience, knowing You’ll always be with us. In Jesus’ name, amen.

4. How is God calling you to live boldly? Consider this question this week, and then commit to pursuing whatever God sets in front of you.

Dangerous Prayers from the book:

• Search Me

• Break Me

• Use Me

The Ministry of a Mentor

SERMON NOTES

Matthew 17:14-20

The players on the field play the game, but the coaches on the sideline came up with the game plan. God put the talent in, but it takes a coach to pull it out.  No one can be their best self, by themselves. You will hit a season where you’ve got the ability, but not the expertise. The willpower, but not the wisdom.

The origin of the issue was satanic.  A person who keeps getting diagnosis wrong, will never experience seasons.  They’ll get stuck in a cycle. Doesn’t change with time, it changes when I do.  Cough syrup wouldn’t fix this issue. 

What have you missed out on because you left too soon?  Our ego has caused us to abandon something prematurely.

Jesus, the leader, takes responsibility for something that isn’t his fault.  It’s not my fault, but it is my responsibility. I couldn’t understand the content until I understood the conTEXT.

Matthew 10:1. He gave them authority.  He equipped them. Trained them.  

You became so close and familiar with me, you took my audience for granted. 

Nothing that God ever does is irrelevant. Wait til you get to chapter 17.

Apathy produces procrastination.  Procrastination is the assumption you’re going to have another opportunity. 

Whenever you get access to greatness, don’t ask greatness to adjust for you.  YOU adjust for IT.

They were not trying to impress someone they were trying to learn from. 

Jesus saved them YEARS with one conversation.  Mentorship allows you to go to school at the expense of someone else’s tuition. 

The thing that got me to one level, is not always the thing that gets me to the next. You need somebody in your life that’s not so impressed with you...that tells you the truth.  You must SEE who He sends. We gotta recognize them. 

Jesus is the Master Mentor - 4 Traits

1. Character

   1. If you are in a relationship with someone...their character becomes your crisis. Not manipulative, representing you in a courtroom. Successful doesn’t mean safe. 

2. Coaching

   1. The quality of the questions you ask.

   2. Re-teach me to do something I thought I already knew how to do. 

   3. What don’t you know, ‘cause you don’t ask. Where are you making assumptions, where you could be educated.

3. Correction

   1. People who are going to the next level must be willing to have their ERROR exposed.  Prov 12:1 It is dumb to want to be right more than you want to be well. 

   2. Correction only sings like judgement to those who are in love with their mediocrity. 

   3. Matthew 16:22-23: Some of us couldn’t walk with Jesus, cause we couldn't handle correction.

4. Covering

   1. I’m some people’s pastor, I’m some people’s preacher, and for some I’m just the guy that preaches at that church they come to sometimes. 

      1. I’m not everyone’s spiritual father.

      2. You can’t mentor anyone who’s deciding and then telling you.

   2. Covering should not be a limiting cap.  It should be an umbrella. It covers you at any level, allows you to rise. 

DISCUSSION

1. Do you have a mentor? Why or why not?

2. Could you see yourself being a good mentor for someone? Why or why not?

3. Would you say you know how to ask good questions? How do you do that?

4. “Correction only sings like judgement to those who are in love with their mediocrity.” What do you think this means?

STUDY AT HOME

• Spend time in prayer asking God who could serve as a good mentor in your life.

• Read Matthew 10-17.

  • As you read, make a list of all the disciples names, and write down traits or characteristics that you notice about each. (example: Peter…seems loyal…) This is called a character study. Read more about them here.

  • What do you observe about how Jesus interacts with his disciples?

  • Which disciple do you identify most with?

We Are Not That Close

SERMON NOTES

Genesis 13:8

The success of the team is not just contingent upon who they have on the court or the field, but the success of the team is contingent upon whether or not those people are in the right positions.  It’s not just people, it’s place. 

Put people where they NEED to be, not necessarily where they want to be.  

An associate is what I call a “tweener” position. It’s not evil, it’s just unique.  A person that’s not evil enough to be an enemy, but not safe enough to be a friend. 

• Doesn’t mean that the fruit for friendship is not there or is not developing.  But it might mean that you might have the time or the desire to do the kind of inspection that would determine whether or not you want to take the relationship beyond the surface level.

• An associate may get your stuff, but a friend gets YOU. 

• An associate may get your skill, but a friend gets your SELF.  

  • ability/transparency. 

  • With someone/on someone

• An associate relationship is a result of intersecting schedules or interests.

Vision is a picture of God’s preferred future. 

“I wanna make your name great”

In order for me to do what’s never been done, you gotta become someone you’ve never been (not someTHING, someONE).  Abram’s not enough. 

• You ready for me to blow you up?? I’m getting ready to blow everything up. 

• You can’t receive vision without disruption

• People who are unwilling to let God disrupt their life, are people who will live without clarity. 

• With vision comes disruption.

• Moses had to move from his country, his family, his household.  You can’t become a new person without new influences. And I gotta move you, Abraham, because you’re going to shrink to the smallness of your circle. 

• Right now, just go north.  Just walk, and as you walk, I’m going to make clear to you what the next steps are.  Before you want the next word, be a good steward of the last one. 

• Maybe God is silent because He’s waiting on some of us to obey the last piece of instruction He gave us. 

Gen 13:1

The beauty of the Bible is in the detail. 

Sometimes when God pushes people into an uncomfortable future, they want to carry something with them from their past. 

God made Abraham wealthy & influential...Lot got the overflow of Abraham’s blessing. 

He probably starts confusing association with personal anointing. 

This tension is created, the dynamic starts to shift--that’s what happens when you carry Lot further than you’re supposed to carry it. Lot was a good relationship for Abram, not Abraham. Some relationships are at their best when you’re at your worst. Abraham addresses the awkwardness. The physical separation can be a metaphor for emotional separation. Abraham acknowledged that this relationship isn’t what it used to be.  

I’m not willing to lose my herds over you. 

Priority for Abraham was distance, not a destination. “Which ever way you go, I’ll go the opposite.” He didn’t mess up the relationship he just acknowledged that they weren’t close.  If I have to manufacture passion to fight for this--I shouldn’t. Many people mismanage this. You become distracted from purpose and you don’t make deposits in the most important relationships, because you're treating Lot like your friend instead of your associate. 

3 TYPES OF ASSOCIATES

1. Parasite.

   1. Lives and is sustained at the expense of the host. 

   2. For this relationship to live, I got to die.

   3. They cause: sleep disorders (you can’t rest), teeth grinding (you gotta grind necessarily), immune system dysfunction (you become more vulnerable, because you're depleted your defenses)

2. Partner

   1. Friends build into you, partners are people you build with. 

   2. These people want my gifts, not me. There’s a spirit of friendship, but it’s really my gift. And that’s not evil, it’s a fact. ‘Cause if you weren’t that good, ya’ll might not be that close. It is a transactional relationship.

3. Pace Makers

   1. Don’t talk to all the time, but they give you that boost.  Battery pack. Good periodically, not good consistently. 

   2. You don’t want them under your skin too long they might cause infection.

Just cause you’re not in pain, don’t mean you’re healed.  

DISCUSSION:

1. How do you think this message will help you in your life?

2. “Friends build into you, partners are people you build with.” Who do you have in your life that builds into you? Who are you building with?

3. “The beauty of the Bible is in the detail.” What do you think this means?

STUDY AT HOME:

1. Find a detail in Genesis 13 to research and study. Bring notes in and tell the group about it.

2. Try to come back next week with a Bible or God question to ask the group and get their opinion on.

"It is not for you to know"

SERMON NOTES

Acts 1:1-9

BEGAN - we would like to think that when Jesus left the earth, his ministry stopped. Not so.

CHOSEN - “you’re still chosen”

You can live life chasing or chosen. We don’t want to be clout chasers. Looking for approval in all the wrong places from all the wrong people.

Are you still focused on the wrong thing? Getting God to change other people rather than transforming you.

“It is not for you to know.”

The Holy Spirit will no longer visit, but inhabit. He doesn’t want a guest room, he wants all the access to my life. The power of His presence.

The presence of Jesus is powerful when you run out of stuff. What was empty without me, is now overflowing WITH me.

If you’re going through a storm right now, if He is on your boat, you won’t go down. When you put your little bit in the hands of a God who created everything.

The Kingdom was inaugurated with what they perceived to be His absence.

He never really leaves. However, he does change forms, and creates space where we need Him.

It’s difficult for us to believe that in the moments we feel Him or understand Him the least, He might be working the most. In the absence of answers, faith is born. In the absence of resource, creativity is born. When is the last time we thanked God for what He didn’t give us, because it showed us who we really are?

Ya ever have somebody that you thought you couldn’t live without, and then you did?

We like the CONCEPT of being used by God. We like the CONCEPT of a relationship with Him. But what about the moments when the kingdom becomes inconvenient?

There’s nothing more painful than in between. If it’s over, I can bury it. If it’s beginning, I can deal with it.

He did not leave them, He changed forms.

Maybe you weren’t ghosted, maybe you were gifted. He no longer wants to just be with you, he wants to be in you.

John 16:7, “But very truly I tell you, it is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Advocate will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.”

I can’t go off of what feels good TO me, I have to believe that what God says is good FOR me.

We all have “some area” where God is working through.

Instead of Jesus giving them something to DO, he gave them something to BE. I’m doing it through some area of your life that you never expected.

That place that you call lack, is the space where God’s spirit wants to live.

DISCUSSION

• Has God ever “ghosted” you? Have you had unanswered questions for Him? What did you do in that season?

• What do you think would have happened if Jesus didn’t go back to heaven? Would the disciples have been able to accomplish what was assigned?

• What was your biggest takeaway from this message?

• What was your biggest takeaway from FV’s “Souls to Save”?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Read Acts 1 & 2.

  • Have you been baptized in the Holy Spirit? Do you have questions about it?

  • What seems to be the difference between Peter before the Holy Spirit, and Peter after?

  • What do you think is the significance of Acts 2:36?

What About Your Friends?

SERMON NOTES

Proverbs 18:24

If nothing has hit your life yet that requires that emotional assistance—keep on living.

We also need support for blessings. It was a success that was so weighty, it began to sink the boat. Their friends got the overflow of their harvest! Some people’s problem is, they left you too soon. One who has unreliable friends is living life unsupported. Anointed/successful, but unsupported. God did not create us to live life without support.

God’s about to send you some burden bearers! Moses, Aaron is coming!

In culture, we call people friends that we like…. From a biblical perspective, when you have friends, they are family. “Closer than a brother.”

Friends get a different type of access

• Love is freely given, access must be earned. Access to the intimate places of your life, heart, confidential information that you just don’t share with anybody. People that are reckless with access are reckless with their life.

• You’d be amazed at how many people are more guarded with their house, than they are with their heart.

• Some people feel owed access.

Friends get a different type of expectation.

• You have a right to expect things from friends, that you don’t expect from other relationships. Jesus got frustrated with the disciples for sleeping, when he asked them to pray.

Friends get a different type of investment.

• Every need is not your responsibility. You’ve got to know who they are, because if not, you will spend out your currency of time and energy making investments into people who don’t meet that criteria!

• There must be the ability to discern, define, and align these relationships. It’s not by feelings, but by FRUIT. Feelings are deceitful.

• I’m not judging, it just makes me sick. I need to see it, so I can separate myself from it.

Fruit inspection must be done seasonally! Every harvest season, you’ve got to go back to the tree and see if it’s still bearing fruit.

• 1 Samuel 16:21-22

• 1 Samuel 18:9-11

• In chapter 17 David defeated Goliath. Influence few. Popularity increased. Saul was cool with David as long as David was running behind him.

• Saul throws spears, people who’s fruit has changed, throw comments.

When you have friends, you get 3 things:

• Accountability

  • Only works when there’s exposure.

  • When your heart is not healthy, you’ll confusing hating with accountability.

• Assistance

  • If you’re always doing the rescuing, that’s not a friend.

• Advancement

DISCUSSION

1. What do you think Pastor Dharius means by “access”? How would you describe it in your life?

2. After listening to this message, would you consider yourself a good friend?

3. What does healthy accountability look like in your life?

4. What spoke to you the most out of this message?

STUDY AT HOME

• Read 1 Samuel 16-18 at home this week, and really consider the perspective of each character (might mean you have to read previous chapters and maybe watch The Bible Project’s 1 Samuel video for context too).

  • What questions does this bring up for you?

  • After listening to this message, would you consider yourself a good friend?

  • What does healthy accountability look like in your life?

Who's At Your Table?

SERMON NOTES

We evolve into who we are around. Prov 27:17

There are no neutral relationships. “Don’t be misled, bad company corrupts good character.”

Our emotions are messengers—”you need to pay attention to this.”

Relationships are purpose partners. Master the life skill of relationship management. NOT talking about the avoidance of pain. I’m talking about the pursuit of purpose.

Relational intelligence is the ability to define and align your relationship.

• Just because you call ‘em something, don’t make ‘em that.

  • I’m defining, not to judge, I’m defining to align. So I know where to put you, so I know what to expect from you. So, if I know you’re a taker, I know not to treat you like a friend.

  • Everyone is to be loved biblically, valued equally, but treated differently.

    • treating everyone right does not mean you treat everyone the same.

    • When you have relational intelligence, you release yourself from the obligation to explain to everybody why they don’t meet the criteria to have access to a certain place in your life.

    • Inner circle people can handle you when you’re at your best, and when you’re at your worst.

    • Everybody gets love, everybody doesn’t get access.

  • Although everyone is equally valuable, everyone does not add equal value to you.

    • Some people are hard to replace, because they are the favor of God. Self-sacrificial love. Loyal, Supportive.

    • Without relational intelligence, the people who mean the most to you, will get the least from you. Living with intentionality.

    • What disrupted the favor of David’s life: relationships.

    • 3 ways you can live your life: Church’s Way, Culture’s Way, King’s Way.

    • When someone is a taker, giving ain’t in them.

    • When there’s relational intelligence, you’re managing imperfect people.

  • Jesus’ friends

    • Thomas - supportive skeptic

      • When you’re struggling with a dream, you don’t call someone who’s gonna help you struggle.

    • James & John - competitors

      • When people are needy, enough is never enough.

      • Good friends, they’re just draining.

    • Nathanael - the blunt buddy

      • truthful, but not tactful.

      • the friend that says anything in front of anyone.

    • Peter - the temperamental team member

      • BFF’s, ride or die, then “I don’t know him”

      • hard to live with, can’t live without him

    • Judas - the blind betrayer

      • he hurt you, but he feel like the victim

      • YOU should be mad, HE mad at you

      • The one that can see everybody else but them

  • ALL OF THEM ARE AT THE TABLE

    • Jesus had to manage all of them differently.

    • Knowing the tree by the fruit that it bears

  • Experience is the most effective teacher, but it is also the most expensive one, costing you time. The mistake costs you time, when you gotta clean it up.

  • God’s not just a need-meeter. He’s a need-assessor.

• Three things that need to happen:

  • open our eyes

    • he didn’t judge what he saw, but he didn’t ignore it.

    • you don’t judge their jealousy, you just love them enough to stop triggering it.

  • open our heart

    • the holy spirit is our sixth sense.

  • open our ears

DISCUSSION:

1. What’s your biggest takeaway from this?

2. How can you use this information in your life right now?

3. “3 ways you can live your life: Church’s Way, Culture’s Way, King’s Way.” What do you think this means?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Find some passages of Jesus interacting with his disciples in Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John. Which one speaks to you the most and why?

The Crushing

This is an excerpt of this talk. The whole thing is a little shy of 2 hours, but it is SO good! To see the whole thing, click here. The notes below are from the entire sermon, not just the excerpt.

SERMON NOTES

If everybody forsakes me, and everybody leaves my room--as long as JESUS is in the room! 

For the eagle “soar” is about flying, but for the eaglet “soar” is about falling.

Crushing is the process, and soaring is the promise.  You cannot have promise without process. Those that God is going to anoint the most, He always crushes the most severely. The further the arrow is going to be shot, the more it must be pulled back. I have learned how to abase and abound.  Whatever state I’m in, therewith to be content. Some things you learn are not for you, but for you to help someone else. Anytime he’s going to exalt you, he humbles you.

Obscurity is a great gift. There’s a reason that God develops an embryo in obscurity.  That moses was hidden in the tent for 3 months. That Christ didn’t start his ministry until he was 30.  To fight your own devils. To get your priorities in alignment. People want success that they have not been groomed for.  It’s like birthing a baby prematurely. The chances of survival go down the earlier the baby is exposed. You don’t want anything before it’s time. It’s not punishment, it’s preparation. Because he loves you, he hides you in obscurity. 

The pressure of success. The reward you get, for overcoming your last challenge, is your next challenge. I never wanted to be famous, I wanted to be effective. You cannot be so driven by ambition that you see obscurity as punishment. The hardest part is managing “success”. The expectations are as different as there are people. Your normal is somebody else’s weird. 

You’re either going to reach the world, or you’re going to honor your traditions. You have to go beyond your traditions in order to be effective. It is the crushing that prepares you not to be more loyal to your traditions than you calling.

Church people get amnesia quick. Jesus was so relevant that the Romans had to hire someone to point him out, because he looked so ordinary in his environment. Jesus wasn’t into standing out, he was into fitting in.  What makes a minister effective and not condescending….the most effective ministers are the ones who see a little bit of themselves coming down the aisle.  KINSMEN with them.

The pressure of fitting into a religious environment can tempt you to hypocrisy..because...we become more concerned about being accepted by the people we worship with, than we are about being used by God!!

PRE Message Syndrome

POST Message Syndrome

Pressure Management System

Fruitfulness is not the end. The process of pressure, if not managed correctly, it can shut you down. 

I refuse to allow how I feel to abort what I’m called to. You can’t see yourself.  When you are truly gifted, it is your normal. The more gifted you are, the more vulnerable you are, and the more affirmation you need from your inner circle…You should hear the guy that’s preaching IN me. I’m preaching against the guy who’s preaching inside of me. 

Gifted people are sensitive and vulnerable. They can’t see themselves.

• Insulate yourself with a few inner circle people who love you enough that you can be vulnerable in front of, and yet are honest enough..

• Jesus & the blind man at Bethsaida.  The healing is ALL based on honesty. The man has to take the first steps in the dark. 

• You cannot let your fear hold you back from your destiny. You have to feel the fear and do it anyway.  Do it broke. Do it scared. Do it on your knees. Do it on crutches.  

Anytime you won’t hear God’s warning, he will chasten you. Sometimes God uses His hand and sometimes he uses yours. But you cannot get God’s people out of God’s hand. God knows exactly where to cut you to make you more productive. In between fruit & more fruit is always a knife. There will be some exodus, some loneliness, some crushing place...weeping/wallowing stage of life.  Because you are His. And He knows exactly where to cut you. 

Knowledge from the divine always comes in waves, not in reason. “BEHOLD” is a download. All of a sudden you know something that you didn’t know before. 

No one else is as up front about the crushing as God! The EMBLEM of Christianity is the cross! Not a crown. God puts the pain up front. Pay something for promotion, process for promise. 

The same part of the brain that processes physical pain, is the same as emotional pain. 

The crushing is not the end. The cross is not the transportation, not the destination. He’s not on the cross anymore!  

When you hear a writer think, it impregnates you with thought. 

Greatness always needs a friend. Someone to say, “I’m scared.”  Sometimes being great ain’t so great. Being crushed and not being allowed to whimper.  When you are superman, nobody knows you’re Clark Kent. 

DISCUSSION

1. What do you do to get through crushing seasons?

2. Can you look back and see a time when God pruned you? What happened?

3. What is your “pressure management system”?

4. What spoke to you the most out of this conversation?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Study & meditate on Matthew 9:14-17. What do you think it means for you right now?

The Path of Joy

SERMON NOTES

“You Can’t Have My Joy”

Assertive and intentional about experiencing God’s best emotionally.

Matthew 25:20-21

Your God is a promise keeper!

• God’s conditions are God’s path to His promises.

• Direction (not intention) determines destination.

“Deep people drown.”

Some people confuse spiritual knowledge with spiritual growth, that’s why they can quote scripture they never use.

If you want it to stay the same, don’t call me.

I didn’t use that creativity you gave me--

I’m ashamed to say I was ashamed. I just hid my gift.  

The path to joy is a street called stewardship!

I’ve never seen anyone have good joy, who is a bad steward. (dominion)

Victim Mentality = learned helplessness

Sometimes it takes a crisis to expose capability that you didn’t even know you had. 

There’s more in you than you know! 

Management/stewardship.  Good management gives you a good life.

Managing the thing that encompasses your life: TIME.

• Irreplaceable asset.

• “Paying” attention = spending time.

• You got some people on your payroll that is making you miserable, and you’re paying them with TIME.

• If you want to improve a relationship, spend TIME.

• “I’m a good person!!” But are you a good steward??

• Not just doing time, thinking time. Everything is created twice.

• You’re not non-judgmentally clear. You’re judging yourself, and you’re not honest with yourself about where you’re at emotionally.

• I’ve never seen anyone who’s not managing their time according to their priorities live with joy.  They always live with frustration.

  • Make time to dream.

One of the greatest joy-robbers is regret.  

Knowledge comes from studying; wisdom comes from God.

You’re gonna need wisdom, but you’re also gonna need courage.

When you hold a boundary, you’re teaching people to love you. 

DISCUSSION:

1. Pastor Dharius said that his series was about being “assertive and intentional about experiencing God’s best emotionally.” What would you say that means?

2. He also said, “The path to joy is a street called stewardship!” How would you rate yourself as a steward?

3. Do you create thinking time in your life? How would that help things, if you did?

4. Do you tend to judge your own thoughts and emotions?

STUDY AT HOME:

We won’t meet again until Jan 8th!
So you have 3 weeks complete the following:

1. Read the Christmas story from the Word.

   1. Matthew 1-2

   2. Luke 1-2

   3. If you have kids, read it with them!

2. When going to family holiday functions, go with one goal in mind: Make it better! Serve your family to the best of your ability (keeping boundaries in mind, of course), and be a good example for them, of how Christ came to serve.

3. Take time to dream & pray a little. Write down some dreams that you have for the next year, next 5 years, next 10 years. Talk them over with God!

Are We There Yet?

SERMON NOTES:

Hebrews 6:11-15

There are some seasons where God is not saying “go”, because God is saying “grow”

Palm Tree posture = you bend, but you don’t break

How big can I believe, how LONG can I believe.  

Hopelessness = Premature anticipation of the failure of the promises of God. 

I’m asking because I do believe I’m ON THE WAY.

I’m not talking about beginning strong, I’m talking about finishing well

God is NOT unjust. He will not forget!

Some people get “alright” and when they get “alright”, they get amnesia.

I’m a God of recompense.

Sometimes I don’t repay evil by doing evil to other people--I repay evil by doing GOOD to YOU.

I prepare a table in the PRESENCE of your enemies.  He allows them to watch you succeed, in spite of them trying to orchestrate your failure.

When people remember, they THINK something.  When God remembers, he DOES something.

God knows how to put you on the right mind at the right time.

Waiting takes your veracity, your tenacity.  But don’t become sluggish!

Faith AND patience...inherited the promises.

Some promises require more than strong faith, some promises require LONG faith.

DUE SEASON can happen at any time. A return for your labor.

You cannot impact those you insult.

Even though Abraham made a mistake, he still got the promise.  They learned the lesson. Your mistakes aren’t sovereign, God is.  They waited patiently, but not perfectly. 

Waiting well isn’t about managing time, it’s about managing me. Ishmael represents something that we produce when we move impatiently. 

1. Don’t worry while you wait.

   1. Worry is mediation on negative narratives.

   2. Jesus uses logic, in Matthew 6:27...can you add an hour to your life by worrying?!

   3. Worry doesn’t make IT better, it makes US worse.

   4. Worry makes you develop a habit of unhappiness.

2. Don’t be worrisome while you wait.

   1. How it affects others.

   2. They both want each other to be what only God can be.

   3. Other people should not be casualties of my own progress.

3. Work while you wait.

   1. Don’t waste this period!

   2. Build something, start something, grow something…

   3. God’s gonna put a tailwind behind my back.

   4. I can love you better when I don’t NEED you.

4. Worship while you wait.

   1. Not even because of what it does spiritually, but because of what it does emotionally.

   2. Worship is not therapy, but it is therapeutic.

   3. God is everywhere all the time, but manifest presence is where you get to experience His presence.

   4. The fruit of His presence is FULLNESS of joy.  Joy is strength.

   5. When you’re not desperate, you can make wise decisions.  You can’t be desperate and wise at the same time.

“I’m gonna pray that God gives you unearned ability to finish.”

DISCUSSION:

• What are you waiting on God for right now?

• How can you get better at waiting/worrying?

• What did you learn about worship from the sermon this past weekend?

• Who was the last person you encouraged? How it make you feel?

• How do you feel God is using you right now?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Can you think of Bible characters who were busy or diligent or patient while waiting for something? (or pick one below to study and tell the group about next week!)

  • Daniel, Mary, Samuel’s mother Hannah, David, Jesus (before his ministry), Noah

"I Think You Were Worth It"

TAKE NOTES HERE:

• Matthew 26:6-13

DISCUSSION:

• What do you think it would look like to take the presence of God for granted?

• Is it your instinct to give your best to God?

• Are your gifts to God useful & generous?

• Are you a cheerful giver? Why or why not?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Read Matthew 26:6-13.

  • What can you apply to your life from this passage?

  • Pastor Steven explained why he gave…why do you give?

• Read Rich Randall’s Story, on Candace’s *new project* The FV Voice: https://fv.church/voiceblog/2019/11/30/where-do-i-sign-up

  • Do you have a giving story like this? What’s your reason for giving to Him?

There's Levels To This

SERMON NOTES

Matthew 13:53-58

Our God is a God of progression. He intentionally orchestrates all the affairs of human existence in a way that everything is advancing toward his intended end of all of our lives. 

I am not built to be stuck.

I need friends who can see with me, not just hang with me. 

LEVELS: God will let you live on whatever level you settle for. It’s not enough for God to want it for us, we must want it for ourselves. 

1. A space outside the will of God. (culture)

   1. Lowest level of living

   2. Decisions guided and governed by my own will and wishes.

   3. I’m going to consult God when I need Him to bring MY will to pass.

   4. At this level, God is a deliverer, not a leader.

   5. Here’s what you have to get: We don’t know what we want!

   6. Human beings are the only ones that reject the manufacturers instructions.

2. The permissive will of God (spiritual knowledge, church)

   1. The average level of living.

   2. A space & place where things are better than they used to be, but aren’t as good as they could be.

   3. He permits, but doesn’t prefer.

   4. It is salvation, but not transformation.

   5. Some people in their own mind won’t allow you to evolve past who you were when they met you. 

   6. He’s talking to people who think they already know God!

   7. We quote scripture at this level...but may not live it. 

3. The preferred will of God. (spiritual experience, Jesus)

   1. Kingdom living is what life looks like when JESUS leads it. 

   2. Church is not the end, it’s the MEANS to this level.

   3. At this level, we LIVE scripture.

   4. God always takes it to the next level, head first. 

God is calling YOU to be what you’re looking for. You are the light of the WORLD. Not church. God wants to use your life as an example of what Level 3 looks like--living the King’s way. 

When we live life that way:

We become a people of passion.

DISCUSSION:

• Pastor Dharius said, “God always take it to the next level, head first.” What do you think God is teaching you right now?

• He also said, “It is salvation, but not transformation.” As a group, define the difference.

• What do you think would have to change in your life, to be fully living “the King’s way”?

• What was your main takeaway from this message?

  STUDY AT HOME:

• Read Matthew 13:53-59 for yourself.

  • What can we learn from the crowd’s offense and refusal to believe in Jesus?

• At-Home Challenge: spend 30 minutes (at least once this week), all alone, doing nothing but praying and listening. What did you learn from that experience? What do you feel like God said to you?
  

Needers & Feeders

Nov 12: Needers & Feeders

The church is not built on special offerings, but people who give CONSISTENTLY to God. Just like children are not built on the uncle that shows up once a year on holidays.

It’s not about your ability, it’s about your availability. 

2 Corinthians 9

When we’re trying to get more of God in our life, He’s trying to get more of us.

“Well, I went to the church, and I didn’t get anything out of it.”  What did you put into it? ‘Cause the last time I went to the bank and asked for more money than I put in, it didn’t work out so well..

Did you ever have someone do something for you that was nice, but the WAY that they did it, made you wish they didn’t do it?

• You can get FAT coming to a church like Elevation. You can begin to feel like you are not needed, and you are not known. And in one sense, you are right. God doesn’t NEED you. He can find someone else. 

• If you think that bringing your PRESENCE into the presence of God is somehow a favor to Him--you probably read the book backwards!

• Paul says, I want to give you the privilege to give to something that is bigger than you.

Vs.8, “and God is able”...”to make all grace abound to you”

Vs. 10, God supplies seed to the sower.  

• A lot of people get stuck at the level of “What I need”. We get stuck in “Me Mode”

• He will respond to your need by giving you a seed.  We want God to give us a HARVEST. But he responds with a seed.

• When I sowed what God gave me, it became what I needed.

• The only way for you to receive what you need, is for you to give what you have.

• God responds to your need with a bigger need….

• Jesus takes the disciples from needers to feeders...they need rest, but they run into needy people. 

• Jesus orchestrated the physical need.

• If you have a big need---you are about to see yourself going from needer to feeder.

  • We do not have enough--but God is able.

  • Jesus enabled the DISCIPLES to feed the 5,000.

  • It’s not are ABLE. It’s are you AVAILABLE.

DISCUSSION:

1. Can you identify a time in your life when you were asking God for a harvest, but He gave you seeds?

2. Can you identify a time in your life when you got stuck in "me mode” with God?

3. Pastor Furtick said, “You get out of it, what you put into it.” What have you been putting into your church?

4. He also said, “You can get fat coming to a church like Elevation…the music is so good…etc.” What do you think he meant by that?

STUDY AT HOME:

1. Study 2 Corinthians 9.

   1. How can you apply verse 6 in your life?

2. Study Matthew 14:13-21.

   1. What else jumps out at you about this passage? What’s interesting? What questions do you have? What can you apply to your life?

3. EXTRA (from VICTORIOUS):

   • Why do you think God wrestled with Jacob in Genesis 31?

Self-Esteem or God-Esteem?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I view myself. All of the past decisions, words said over me, mirror-thoughts, clothing choices, locker room talk, ad-campaigns…so many external sources affecting my internal conversations.

The World wants to tell you that the antidote to all this is to just believe in yourself. If we just find out who WE really are, then we can delight in that. The problem with that is that you can’t find out who you really are, without understanding your Creator, the One that made you.

-Candace

Psalm 139

1 O Lord, you have examined my heart

and know everything about me.

2 You know when I sit down or stand up.

You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.

3 You see me when I travel

and when I rest at home.

You know everything I do.

4 You know what I am going to say

even before I say it, Lord.

5 You go before me and follow me.

You place your hand of blessing on my head.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too great for me to understand!

7 I can never escape from your Spirit!

I can never get away from your presence!

8 If I go up to heaven, you are there;

if I go down to the grave,[a] you are there.

9 If I ride the wings of the morning,

if I dwell by the farthest oceans,

10 even there your hand will guide me,

and your strength will support me.

11 I could ask the darkness to hide me

and the light around me to become night—

12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.

To you the night shines as bright as day.

Darkness and light are the same to you.

13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body

and knit me together in my mother’s womb.

14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!

Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.

15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,

as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.

16 You saw me before I was born.

Every day of my life was recorded in your book.

Every moment was laid out

before a single day had passed.

17 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.

They cannot be numbered!

18 I can’t even count them;

they outnumber the grains of sand!

And when I wake up,

you are still with me!

19 O God, if only you would destroy the wicked!

Get out of my life, you murderers!

20 They blaspheme you;

your enemies misuse your name.

21 O Lord, shouldn’t I hate those who hate you?

Shouldn’t I despise those who oppose you?

22 Yes, I hate them with total hatred,

for your enemies are my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 Point out anything in me that offends you,

and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

MEN: again, I trust that you can see past the women’s conference nature of this message. She’s just preaching the Word!

DISCUSSION:

• How has your perception of God changed over the years?

• Have you ever thought of this passage of scripture as particularly feminine or masculine? Are there any passages that are one or the other?

• Which verse really speaks to you the most out of this chapter?

STUDY AT HOME:

• Find one more Psalm that means a lot to you. Next week, share with the group about why it means so much to you.

  • Use www.biblegateway.com to compare bible versions of that chapter. How do they compare?

An Unguarded Anointing

This is a Colour Conference teaching, which means it’s a women’s conference teaching, but MEN, I trust you can try to ignore that and apply to yourselves! :)

The Hillsong Channel is a monthly subscription service, but you can watch this with a 30-day free trial!

SERMON NOTES:

Judges 13-16

Samson had the Holy Spirit. Whatever your calling is in life, you are fully incapable of doing it, without the holy spirit.

1. Every believer is enormously gifted and empowered.

   1. Guard the gift

2. An unguarded anointing is an accident waiting to happen.

   1. It is not IF, but WHEN. If you aren’t deliberately guarding your anointing.

   2. There’s nothing on earth like the rush of the HS, but sometimes we get more addicted to the RUSH, than the Holy Spirit.

   3. Regular warfare will often be an attack on our weaknesses. Seduction is different. It comes for your strengths.

   4. His strength was in his anointing, but the hair was a symbol of his set-apartness.

   5. The enemy makes your look like a fool but you’re the last one to know it.

3. We are not just vessels of the anointing, we are stewards.

   1. It’s not just about who we are...it’s about what we are going to do with what we’ve been given.

   2. No one can steward your gift for you.

4. Conceit is the lazy, gifted persons anointing.  If I don’t wanna go through the trouble of being full of the HS, we can just be full of ourselves!

   1. Do we want a puffing or a filling?

   2. Sometimes the reason we have a thorn in our flesh is because it pops that puffing of ourselves!

   3. The enemy wore him down. “He was vexed to death.”

   4. The enemy flirts and then he torments.

   5. “But the hair of his head began to grow again.” Hair grows back. The anointing can grow back. 

5. Get back up.

   1. The enemy would have you lose your salvation, because you lose your vision.

DISCUSSION:

• What was your biggest takeaway from this sermon?

• Where else does the Bible talk about anointing?

  • As a group, try to define Biblical anointing.

• Do you think you are anointed to do something in the Kingdom of God? What is it?

• What does it mean to be a steward of anointing?

• Beth said, “The enemy flirts and then he torments.” Have you ever experienced this first hand? How did you break the cycle?

  STUDY AT HOME:

• Read Judges 13-16.

  • Are there any ways in which you identify with Samson?

  • How can we apply Samson’s story with God to our own lives?

• How do we properly care for the blessings God gives us?

  ”Extra credit”: read Judges 10-12 too, before the weekend! :)