SERMON NOTES
If nothing has hit your life yet that requires that emotional assistance—keep on living.
We also need support for blessings. It was a success that was so weighty, it began to sink the boat. Their friends got the overflow of their harvest! Some people’s problem is, they left you too soon. One who has unreliable friends is living life unsupported. Anointed/successful, but unsupported. God did not create us to live life without support.
God’s about to send you some burden bearers! Moses, Aaron is coming!
In culture, we call people friends that we like…. From a biblical perspective, when you have friends, they are family. “Closer than a brother.”
Friends get a different type of access
Love is freely given, access must be earned. Access to the intimate places of your life, heart, confidential information that you just don’t share with anybody. People that are reckless with access are reckless with their life.
You’d be amazed at how many people are more guarded with their house, than they are with their heart.
Some people feel owed access.
Friends get a different type of expectation.
You have a right to expect things from friends, that you don’t expect from other relationships. Jesus got frustrated with the disciples for sleeping, when he asked them to pray.
Friends get a different type of investment.
Every need is not your responsibility. You’ve got to know who they are, because if not, you will spend out your currency of time and energy making investments into people who don’t meet that criteria!
There must be the ability to discern, define, and align these relationships. It’s not by feelings, but by FRUIT. Feelings are deceitful.
I’m not judging, it just makes me sick. I need to see it, so I can separate myself from it.
Fruit inspection must be done seasonally! Every harvest season, you’ve got to go back to the tree and see if it’s still bearing fruit.
1 Samuel 16:21-22
1 Samuel 18:9-11
In chapter 17 David defeated Goliath. Influence few. Popularity increased. Saul was cool with David as long as David was running behind him.
Saul throws spears, people who’s fruit has changed, throw comments.
When you have friends, you get 3 things:
Accountability
Only works when there’s exposure.
When your heart is not healthy, you’ll confusing hating with accountability.
Assistance
If you’re always doing the rescuing, that’s not a friend.
Advancement
DISCUSSION
What do you think Pastor Dharius means by “access”? How would you describe it in your life?
After listening to this message, would you consider yourself a good friend?
What does healthy accountability look like in your life?
What spoke to you the most out of this message?
STUDY AT HOME
Read 1 Samuel 16-18 at home this week, and really consider the perspective of each character (might mean you have to read previous chapters and maybe watch The Bible Project’s 1 Samuel video for context too).
What questions does this bring up for you?
After listening to this message, would you consider yourself a good friend?
What does healthy accountability look like in your life?